#1 Poetry – Stones

When you feel blocked to write, your communication and expression is blocked and it stores up and so I don’t feel this Poem is necessarily completely prominent for the actual time period it was written August 2023, more a collection of events over the years triggered by a situation that then allowed my mind to process and release onto my digital note pad which was a new experience as I love pens and paper.

I have a lot to say about a lot, and I like to film on Wednesdays to post on Fridays, but on Wednesday, I was struggling to put into words what I wanted to talk about. So I thought, let’s do a poem.

After the poem I talk about people’s narrative, interpretation, being loud, the way I am, not feeling accepted….its around 5 mins long the whole video.

Background

I have been writing poetry since around age 7. I wrote my first poem with a close family friend, “Accross the road from me,” which was basically a very simple rhyming poem about the houses and gardens I could see. It was pretty impressive for my age.. I will share it at some point when I venture into Pandoras box. I have recently got my Pandoras storage box ready to open, full of folders, journals, art, and scrap bits of paper with many words written over the years and at peak times of my mental health struggles.

My intention is to share some of my most deepest poems as it highlights the struggles of one of the most difficult times off my life – educational years, in particular from the secondary school years until I left Uni twice with no degree – hormones, loneliness, struggles with friendships, paranoia, low mood, overwhelm etc that continued on and off throughout my life. It was hard then for younger people without any support or experience in spectrum disorders like there are now. But now, with the added pressures of the digital world, it’s even more prominent to normalise even more struggles, whatever the age. It still needs normalising and validating.

So, I’m going off as I do. There is so much to say. This poem was written more recently in 2023 and was one of my first poems that’s I’d written in years. Please feel free to share my YouTube videos via YouTube as it’s public if you feel it may help others.

𝙝𝙩𝙩𝙥𝙨://𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙪𝙗𝙚.𝙘𝙤𝙢/@𝙗𝙪𝙙𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮𝙪𝙠

𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗵𝘁𝘁𝗽𝘀://𝗯𝘂𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗯𝘆.𝗰𝗼.𝘂𝗸/

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𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺 @𝗯𝘂𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗯𝘆𝘂𝗸